User Error

I posted a photo of my husband. My aunt really wanted to respond. 

Sharing Pictures

One of my aunts likes to share pictures. One day she posted a photo of a snake to my sister’s wall – and my sister texted me about it. I don’t like snakes, and my sister often shares snake pictures with me. I then asked my sister if she liked the horse and eagle one from the day before. She had not seen it. It’s possibly the perfect picture. 

Will YOU take your golden eagle for a horse ride today?

Posting Mistakes

My sister posted this hilarious meme about Tim Tebow. Neither of us are Elizabeth, although she could be talking about our hair because the aunts are oddly attached to our hair. Which is a weird visual. 

 

A Red Squiggly Line Under a Word Means It’s Spelled Wrong

Translation: I was in Vegas when you were that age Avery, beautiful little girl; your family came and picked my husband and I up and went to your home at the base. A jet had crashed on the runway the day before, the pilot parachuted out safe. I have pictures of your family in front of our hotel. Love you, hope you are doing well with your back. 

Note: my cousin’s name is not Avery, or anything remotely like the word Avery. Maybe I have another cousin named Avery? It's completely possible.

Second Note: I think she thinks “Picture” is actually spelled “Pitcure.” Because it has never been spelled right, not ever.

Punctuation is Important

This gem was posted by one of my Great Aunts, on my mom’s wall. My mom doesn’t discuss bodily functions ever. However, my great aunts always ALWAYS have. As teenagers my sister and I would howl with laughter on the way home from a visit as we counted the incidents of poo and gas mentioned. 

So you can understand how this post, with no punctuation, sent to my mom while she had a stomach bug could be misinterpreted. How *I* and everyone else read it:

I hope you are better today, no gas to come. See about you, love you, and worry about you.

How it was intended:

I hope you are better today. No gas[oline] to come see about you. Love you and worry about you.

Punctuation is important.

More Public Shaming

Or I guess this one could also be, “When Moms Use Facebook.” Although my mom calls to ask permission before posting anything on my page, because she knows I’m friends with both business and personal friends. But my Great Aunts have no such filter. And while there are many excellent examples of public shaming of my sister and me by this aunt, she really does save some of the best for her son. 

This first sample is a photo of a motorcycle posted by my cousin. He often posts bike photos. His sister was killed in a very tragic accident while on a bike before I was born, so I’m probably going to hell for using this as my first example. 

Sample #2

Yikes. I would like to point out – it’s been two weeks and he hasn’t responded.

Sample #3

 

My cousin owns a BBQ restaurant. I’m sure this is exactly what he wants his customers and friends to think about – him running up to Tennessee to nab some free pork.